Selamat Hari Raya

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri. Please forgive all my wrongdoings. I'm leaving. I'll be leaving for my hometown tomorrow. My mind beats me. He arrived there last week. So now I seem mindless try to finish some errands before tomorrow. Just got a bad news 2 days ago. My son has to undergo the 2nd operation after raya. Well, well..

*flashback*Last month, he went through the first one. The operation was about to get rid of small but infectious lump between his chin and his neck. I dont know the medical term for it nor I know what caused it. But I do know that it is getting harder, bigger and too painful for Nabil.

So, one morning, we checked in into a ward. The operation was supposed to be in the afternoon, so Nabil has been denied food and drink. I'm trying hard to divert his attention by playing or watching tv, while waiting. The Wonderpets just ended, meaning it's already 3pm, but we patiently waited for no avail. Then a nurse told us that the pediatric surgeon was handling some emergency case, so we have to expect some delay. I really didnt mind as he should know his priority better. 2 hours later, we had been brought to a counter outside the Operation Theatre(OT).

Nabil already felt the uneasiness. He didnt want to get hold nor seated. A few minutes later, one huge guy came out from the OT. He's the anesthesia specialist. We chatted for a while before he carried Nabil away from us. Nabil just could not stop screaming, and my wife could not stop crying. Last time he screamed, was at PASTI pre-school. Back then, my wife cried too. Now, while knowing risk was low, I still have to comfort her telling everything is gonna be ok. About 20 mins later, a nurse called us into the pre/post operation room as Nabil already started screaming in pain, after he woke up. We gently hold and persuaded him until we were back at the room. The misery didnt end there. He had to wait at least 6 hours before he can touch any food or drink for the anesthetia effect went off. He sobbed and sobbed until he's too weak and my wife put him to sleep.

A month later, the wound has not cure itself. After numerous time going in/out for follow-ups, the condition persists. During last appointment, the doctor advised us to go for 2nd operation. Life is like a wheel, you got your ups and downs, people say. Now, I feel like being down, and the wheel is not spinning and stucked forever. Even though it is not a major operation, we still feel helpless. For the parents, it's the journey that's more painful. I respect and pray for families that have to go a far more critical situation than mine. Despite the insurance coverage issue (since I'm leaving the company), I hope everything will go smoothly this time. As for my son, I wont hint him about the operation until the last minute. I dont want him to have a spoiled holiday, although my wife and I are holding our back, smiling in disguise.

The reduced-oil-price is not going to make me feel any better. I feel too tired to wait, quite worried to start anew. Let's hope for the best. Let's hope for the wheel to start spinning. God willing. Once again, Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri, have a good journey with beloved family and drive safely.